How can I take my best ever photograph?

How can I take my best ever photograph?

I've been wondering how to make my photography better and realised that simply making a conscious effort isn't enough. the other side of my brain- my intuition, my emotional understanding- can contribute a lot, aligned with better techniques. As with so many other things, these days, I find that consulting Tarot helps to find my inner truth.

Just follow the link to the post in it's entirety.

Starfire Talks Getting too Personal ?

This blog is at times getting so personal and I am having so much fun discovering myself through it, that I really have no desire to stop on this journey. However, I recognise that people who may some day come to read the words of wisdom here may find it disappointing. So a new solution has emerged, much as has ever happened on this blog. A new offshoot is once again born- a green shoot has spread out into the net and is ready for a life of it's own!

We now have Starfire Teaches (Cosmic Understanding)
Starfire Dreams (Dreams and Reflections)
We have umpteen online galleries for the photos and some photo-blogs too, not to mention the You-Tube video-blogging. So now it is time for the first truly hidden blog that will remain unadvertised, but will have a safe place for my innermost thoughts. Future researchers can try and find it to discover what life really was like for me and others in our time. What a find for them!

It will be... let's try and be original here...

Starfire Ponders?. Hey, now that has a ring to it! It will be my thoughts and feelings that I don't usually tell others and very hard to find, as it will be a diary. Not for the public. Not even for the initiated- just for the lucky and, of course, my maker as a kind of intimate communication with Him. Which is why, even here, I'm not giving the real name.

Look out for it and say goodbye to some of the more 'personal' posts here:) It may or may not surprise you that some of them were in fact so personal that they never even got published.

Appealing to the Universe

It has been decided- I will visualise myself leading a life in the environment I most desire and then the universe- or God following such a heartfelt prayer if you will- will then look after me, filling in the details. You see, my desire, my dream, is of my spiritual nature, my deeply embedded knowledge of who I truly want to be. It is in a sense analogue, feeling. Meanwhile, the three-dimensional world of 'reality', the society we inhabit, is in a sense digitised. You either have or don't have a particular job. There is a clear line between fantasy and reality, one that perhaps our daydreaming thoughts don't respect, but an existent one nonetheless.

We can try and affect this digital, binary process, but really, not being 'reality programmers', it is not our task. The God, godlings, higher beings, authority figures be they kings or administrators- all those with the actual power are tasked with this. This is why the Bible teaches that God allows those who administrate to do so- ultimately, they are a shadow of His power. So, idealistic though it may sound, our appeals to God and our faith, our communication with the universe, is the best way- and then those with power can resolve every little detail, with the ability they have to do so.

This means that the job we dream of may be our own job transfigured, or another. The same goes for any aspect of our lives- the main thing is to have the sense of vision that it can be true. What we truly want is destined to us- it is in a world of values and feelings, not just the literal world of 'yes and no'. Yet the place where reality overtakes fantasy is in this literal world. Those with the power can make such things work out for us- be they beings seen or unseen.

New Dreams

These days I have been sleeping in deeply, as I often do in the winter months. Thoush I am somewhat anxious about what will happen with my school and what comes next, I also realise that such anxieties are part and parcel of the insecure human condition- one in which all things change and degrade if left too long- one in which we never really know what the future holds.

So relaxed with this awareness, I drift into deep inner worlds. The other night I was in a dream, drifting above the Earth, where the god who controls disneyland decided that people were taking the place forgranted and not appreciating the deip mythic messages within it, so he disconnected the electricity. I was surprised when, a few days later, my girlfriend told me that in fact the electricity had stopped there for a while a week ago and many people complained as they had come so far and the most interesting rides were out of action! Living in high-tech Japan, Disney is a kind of heaven so I can appreciate their disappointment.

Another dream last night had me witnessing a robot who had the desire to seize control of an empire or something like it. This future had decided that to limit the possibility of wrongdoing, each advanced robot would have a team-member son they can keep each other in check. This particular robot was giving orders to his very loyal team-member that were helping him seize power, all along intending to destroy what might be his one real barrier. Pushing him from a high ledge to his doom,, I was saddened to see him carry through such terrible plans and reminded of the ways of the Sith in Star Wars, in which the apprentice seeks to destroy the master and thus gain his wrongfully held power.

One more of these fantastic, but ultimately rather disturbing dreams saw me in some mythic past, watching as one of a team of warriors was carrying out his task to destroy a horde of aliens deemed unclean and dangerous. He felt no wrong-doing in what he saw as a neccessary task- but as he pursued them downhill into a valley, one of them leapt toward him, a seeming mix between a human and a deer. Suddenly, he fell in love with her and she with him- he forgot his now despised task and they kissed- at which point she was transfigured into a beautiful creature. I was then told that this was the reason why we call those we love 'dear'- all steming from this moment. Then I heard wonderful, full classical music, perhaps that of Bach. It was as if it was supra-live, all around me and enriching the air itself with it's sounds. Sometimes I hear this heavenly music and believe it to be the famous 'music of the spheres'.

I am now alternating to going to parties, cooking, taking and sharing photos and this deep sleeping and dreaming. It is a wonderfully bohemian existence and I hope it long continues. I am, learning so much, feel so warm and safe in God's healing love. I suppose these dreams are some way of dealing with my deepest fears, of the abuse of power and the unfair treatment of people. Yet coming as fantasy, they have an excitement, emotionally moving aspect and sheer aesthetic joy that comes from art itself. So I wish to know more. To know more of the victories of Love and what it means in each and every dimention.

God be praised for revealing truth now as he ever has done,

Amen.

Motivations

In case anyone is using this as an alternative root to get to the rest of my artistic and experimental works, please take a look at my Messages, made with the Flickr-linked 'motivator' tool. I doubt all that many people there will be interested in these creations other than from an artistic standpoint, but still, I tryb and make thses more and more close to universal truth.

You can see them here-

Messages

Please enjoy

Starfire

Holding to the Sacred

I have a very bad habit of experiencing a great, blissful experience, one which shines with eternal love, relayed through the universe- only to let my resident fears and insecurities rupture the bubble of reality and let in 'the world' of limitations, of sufferings. Put short, especially when sensitised by great experiences, I am liable to feel something, some small irregularity so troubling it is as if it is poised to shatter the calm- which, then, over-reacting with a sudden burst of what looks like bad-temper, but is in reality a flowering of insecurity, an attempt to preserve security anew.

This is what I wish to conquer- my temper, my insecurity, my backwards- rushing perceptions that pull me back just when I am making the most progress. I want to extend my trust and keep the good feeling flowing, somehow let those destructive, unstable energies and my cynicism find a new channel, so as not to impinge in the purity of heavenly perceptions. I do really mean heavenly perceptions- I regularly experience satori-like bliss, a gift from a loving God, but then hours later my own feeling is ruptured when some small thing goes wrong.

I don't see this as just my problem- I see it as humanity's problem, yet as a human, it is as much mine as anyones, the 'cross I have to bear'. Good, trustful communication and a stronger faith could well help. To some extent, techniques like deep breathing, counting to ten could help, but what I am looking for is something beyond repression, rather to let it out in a healthy and positive way. Sometimes this can mean sharing what I am thinking with someone, however crazy it sounds, but then I need to be careful not to let it be done in a damaging way- either of their feelings or of my reputation for being sane! (Something that this blog, in the wrong hands, could well do- but the love of freedom of speech and the relative anonymity of the internet make this expression possible, in line with the 'avoid repression' policy above).

It is almost as if God gives me these great glimpses of eternity, or eternal love, that great ocean of kindness, of mercy and beauty, only to test my faith by allowing reality to nip me like a biting mosquito, to see if my faith is strong enough to maintain heavenly perceptions despite these provocations- many of which are no doubt merely imagined by a restless mind. Of course, another possibility s that my mind has been long-conditioned to define 'reality' as a negative to be faced, one which is escaped from in 'fantasy' realms. Knowing more, from the study of Reality (with a capital R) and religion, I now know that it is reality that is good and our psychology that is full of pitfalls and mental potholes.

The ancient problem remains- how to be truly religious and in the world at once? The ancient answer comes back- by conquering our own self and thereby the world, no longer feeling bothered or 'messed around' by it. A heavenly calm, a divine passion, accompanying heavenly perception. The only anger is righteous anger, to write wrongs, not an exaggerated sense of our own misfortunes or pressures. Psychology makes true religion possible, the feminine balanced with the masculine in a universe that is, essentially, feminine, inhabited by masculine minds.

A New Understanding

Recently, there have been times when I feel washed over by some great stream of love, whether lying in bed or walking in beautiful nature. I thought it was coming from someone in particular, but now I think it's source is God. Love for humans seems to be channeled through people, as God loves us through us loving one another- nothing more profound has ever been found. I just started to realise that it is so strong that it can only be considered sacred, a great healing stream of Love, personalised especially for me. My thought now is that it is coming from God, it is of the same essence as Jesus, it is the love of God and of Jesus.

That Jesus is more than a historical teacher is a new understanding for me. I intellectually accepted such a possibility before, but now it seems to be to some extent a truth in my reality- a very different proposition. The first time this happened in living memory was when I was going to move apartments and he appeared out of no-where, lying next to me. Yet, really, it was as if he had always been there, not just in himself, but in the great network of loving people who have sustained and helped me throughout my time on this planet.

I have to accept the possibility that he really did come to Earth to teach us, show us how to live and then suffer on a cross, to awake in a spiritual body later. Doctrinal issues such as whether or not he actually died on the cross are not my concern- the point being that he cared and made sacrifices to set us free- sacrifices we no longer need to make. This new freedom to experience great love is coming more into my awareness and it is a healing presence, to the extent that I let it in and remove my distrustful barriers.

One thing that taking LSD really did teach me is that there are who universes of reality that we habitually block out, and that when our blocks are removed, it seems to flood in- but at the same time it is as if we knew that it was always there. In the case of this love- God's love- I seem to be ever-blocking it with my distrust, my paranoia, my clinging to everyday consciousness and an insecurity in my surroundings that seems to always be with me. Of course, I am not alone in this and to some extent this is the problem with just about everyone- blocking God's ever-present love with their thoughts, wayward feelings and self-centered ways of life.

Now, it is almost a battle to see which will win. I have to be somewhat socially aware to do my job well. Yet this social awareness brings with it the danger of politics, of feeling I have to defend my position from possible attacks. Granted, this is a paranoid way to see work, and a more positive, expansive view would be better. Of course, I hope this positive view succeeds. Yet, it is ever-hard to integrate a higher awareness with daily activities, especially when one's surroundings do not exactly encourage such awareness. Yet, I will find a way.

It is possible to have love and daily reality, the first enlightening the other. It is possible to trust those around you and forgive their trespasses when they mistakenly injure our sense of well-being, in however small a way. With that gift of forgiveness, the path of love is laid free. God showed us a way to live in the world and simultaneously be filled with His love- a love channeled by his people. This is why so many love songs mix the human love with it's divine source. It is as it was prophesied- love and daily reality, the first enlightening the other.

God is a Fair Employer

Well, I'm back here and it seem that a lot of my blogger stuff has gradually moved over to my Perfect Futures pages and also my video-blogging. The latter is getting some attention, though I still need a lot of work on presentation. There are various series- Tech Talk, Cosmic Transitions (a kind of video-version of Starfire Teaches, or that's what I hope for), and the usual assorted clips and slideshows. I am also starting to pay more attention to issues- partly how they effect me (including emotionally- news seems to do that to me a lot, maybe I'm a bit of a news junkie) and how they potentially could do.

An amazing thing happened. I prayed to God for some financial reward for serving Him and compensation for my stress over the summer- a time when I tried to just do the right thing by my family, but was frequently misunderstood. I want to work for God and what kind of employer doesn't get around to paying? I was then promised a cheque in the mail, that would give me something to do with university in November, to the sum of about 1,000,000 yen, though there would be a 9 in there somewhere to make this possible. mysterious, huh?

A few days later, my mum emailed to say that she had been offered some more funds she was due from her parent's inheritance, $9,000 to be exact and she decided that she wanted it to be for me to study something in university to help with my future. I thanked her and asked if she wanted to split it or something- she said no, she wanted me to have it. It came and, converted to yen, it is about a million. but it arrived in October... hmmm. I took it to citibank, where it turns out they take 22 days or so to process the cheque, bringing me into that month.

So, for anyone paying attention, God does pay his prophets, his love is supra-material, but also in the material sphere. More to the point for me, it seems, with all this Nova crisis I had better improve my marketability and indeed employability for better-paying jobs- and an MA would seem to be the best way to do this (trying to drum up private students has yet to prove really profitable, but I suppose, like the occasional photographic job, it is fun and a good sideline). Come November, I will try to sign up for an online course.

Thanks, God, for this and of course everything else- dream girlfriend, apartment, job and beautiful co-worker too. I suppose many will say this is juts good luck or random chance, which is often what I say when I don't want to get too deep. But we all know how ridiculous it is to try putting any form of Worldly government before that of the Universe itself. God is in charge, sees all in our hearts and is very much not mocked. Clever words may impress one's fellow man- but not God- who respects the Love that is the essence of all things and ultimately rewards those who keep his most basic commandment- to LOVE.

The Work

It came to me in a dream, as all the best ideas do. My next step is to write a book- I have the time, I think I have the will, all that is needed is the ideas and the inspiration. A book is a long, drawn out process but also a chance to more fully develop one's ideas on paper.

Of course, it will be serialised here to some extent in advance, where my audience (no-one and everyone) will see it! It will cover some of the themes here, but it will also be fresh and original, breathing new life into the whole genre of 'the book'. I am thinking of having a character who desires to break free from the limitations of suburban life, but also from the 'dangerous' escapisms that so often figure in usual attempts.

In order to expand it's appeal, I can deliberately restrict the appearance of 'exotic elements' such as talk of angels or extraterrestrial beings. Though they will remain in the background, as my aim is to present a realistic vision, not a human-centric fantasy of a universe controlled only by homo-sapiens, the existance of more highly-evolved beings being denied. Yet, I should remember my chosen audience- the best and brightest of the generation and the rest of the population along with them.

The work is taking form in my dreams, so far it is extremely vague. I actually for a long time didn't like the idea of making a book, as it seemed too contrived and overdone. But the genre, the medium, rather, exists for a reason and a book (as scripture, for example) can be far more than a 'book'. It can be a gateway to other worlds.

The truth is that I haven't picked up a book in a long while, being immersed in the internet, seen through my screen. I also haven't written on paper much, preferring the word-processor ability to re-edit on the computer. If all of this sounds a little soulless, perhaps it is, but convenience, instant publishing and having everything in one place is what makes it so attractive, not to mention the automatic spell-checking.

If Starfire Talks is primarily a record of my thoughts, it makes sense that they should have a concrete goal- if no real destination. something that can be referred to. For a while I flirted with the idea of The Foundation, but that simply hasn't become any clearer and at least to my personality, seems overwhelming. So the next stage, if nothing changes, is that of The Work- a book, perhaps, but in fact something more.

An Interesting Lesson

Yesterday, when teaching at school, a boy kicked the boy next to him while he was reading his homework out, so of course I told him off. He then continued to subtly and not-so-subtly harass him (I'm not sure why, but it probably wasn't the first boy's fault and even if it was), leading to his 'victim', who also seemed to be his friend (to an extent) trying to escape from the situation by staring into his text book. Since it happening was right near me, (even though I'm technically an ALT and not in charge of disciplining the students) I made the 'bully' keep himself to himself. I pondered whether to temporarily move him, not really wanting to do anything overt that might lead to later recriminations of the 'victim', who might later be blamed for it when I'm not around. So, I decided instead to just dock his homework score by a point, however good it was. After all, interrupting someone else's homework is in a sense not being good at the whole homework thing:)

So, this I did, out of his sight, but he must have realised something had changed, as at that very moment, he accidentally kicked his own desk and said a loud 'ouch!' I looked at him with a mixture of sympathy and 'That's karma you little f***' and then from that point on he was very nice to the boy next to him, (who seemed to be his friend after all), offering to share his pens- a perfect result all around.


The incident made me think of the so-called 'Book of Life', in which angels are held to write the names of the righteous. What if all through life we have various tests and they mark us on them, just as I was marking my mark-book? What if these tests are not so much to see what we are already like, but more to transform us into something better, into more caring people, hoping for a better grade from such angels and the resultant promotions and blessings that come from such exhibitions of faith? Yes, our works may not save us, but our attitudes and how we respond on a moment-to-moment basis might. Every day, we are being helped along on this path- we just need to learn the right lessons.